THE PRESENTATION of the annually coveted internationally applauded 'Thank you' Awards took place here last night amidst a freak sandstorm and gale force winds that destroyed celebrity tents and caused a mass camel stampede.
Despite the hostile weather conditions, many thousands of adoring fans braved the inhospitable elements and patiently gathered outside the main tent hoping to get a glimpse of Jesus Christ and other luminaries from the worlds of entertainment, politics, and sport.Superstar Jesus Christ, the tall, bearded, handsome, young philosopher and confirmed bachelor, attended the event with three of his apostles – Peter, Mark, and Luke – a week after his capacity-packed 'Sermon on the Mount' performance at Mount Sinai.
Standing atop of a large bounder that overlooked the parched terrain Jesus recited his new run-away hit ‘The Lord's Prayer. The philosophical prose was written by the carpenter-cum-philosopher in tribute to his father. It became a sensational success overnight and is being recited aloud continuously throughout the nation especially by poor, disenchanted families living in squalor in the run-down inner-tent areas.
The bearded handsome miracle worker was expected to scoop the pool of ‘Thank you’ awards, including the coveted gold trophy, but to everyone’s surprise and disappointment he succeeded in getting only one award and it wasn’t the Gold.
This angered the star-studded audience who rose to their feet, roared their disapproval, and openly accused officials of rigging the results.
In protest, popular media personality Frank Peters, walked out during the awards ceremony. He told reporters waiting outside that he was "shocked, outraged, and saddened" that Jesus had received only one 'Thank You' award despite having saved the lives of many people, including ten lepers. “It’s unbelievable, totally unfair, and outrageous,” he said, in a loud voice.
Jesus, who wore a loose-fitting seamless red robe, hand-stitched by his mother, Mary, showed no surprise, disappointment, or anger and sat meditatively in the back row throughout the supercharged controversial proceedings.
"I am not as forgiving as Jesus," said Mr Peters, who was visibly angry and upset.
"Without doubt, this has been the greatest travesty of justice of the century which will abhor all future generations to come," he told a media conference.
"If this gifted young man cannot receive even a 'Thank You' for every life he saves, there is little or no hope for any of us ever being thanked for anything that we would do. How can saving a life be compared to any financial goodwill gesture we would perform?
"How could our deeds even come close to matching his?" he said, angrily stamping the rostrum with his clenched fist.
"This has created a precedent of the worst kind,” he continued. “It's a heart-breaking, absurd thought, but it's now crystal clear to me that unless we wish to face disappointment, nobody should ever expect a 'thank you' from anyone for anything!
"It is a black day in our history. A great injustice has been caused to Mr Jesus Christ, which reflects poorly upon all of us individually and collectively. What we allow to happen helps make us what we then become. We are a product of our own making and what has happened is not right... it’s just not right," he added.
BAD MANNERS
Professor Washim Akram, a human behavioral analyst from Palestine University, told the Palestine Post that bad manners in general were a flaw of character, but not confined just to lepers or those from poorer classes.
"It is common, particularly in the poorer inner tent areas, but the main cause is sub-standard education and poor upbringing," he said.
"Expressing thanks, seemingly, is no longer the norm. Sadly, good manners are on the decline everywhere and it's a sign of the times, which we must learn to accept and learn to live with.
"There will be some good, decent, honourable, well brought-up people who will always keep the noble tradition alive, but we should not expect too much from people in general who are unable to experience thanks-giving. It’s in the nature of these people to just want to take. Generous allowances must be made for the unaware, ignorant, and uneducated and we, ourselves, must teach them by example.
"I feel the man they call Jesus would want it that way," Professor Washim said.
Mr Peters said he would continue to thank those to whom he's grateful irrespective of the growing trend to do the opposite. He said he finds bad manners inexcusable, deplorable, and blight on society.
"A gesture of kindness extended is a previous 'thank you' remembered," he philosophized.
It was mooted earlier this year to widen the scope of the 'Thank You' Awards and embrace all of Europe and other parts of the world. The fiasco that erupted last night, however, appears to have dampened the enthusiasm of organizers and investors.
Most officials today were being very tight-lipped about the future of 'Thank You' in general as the most appropriate expression of gratitude, despite its financially economic attributes.
One well-known Councillor, who wishes to remain anonymous, told Palestine Post:
"The fabric of society on the whole is fraying at the end. The 'Thank you' controversy is another indication of this sorrowful erosion and, yes, it's sad ... very sad and very disrespectful. We all suffer in the human community as a consequence.
"It should be made abundantly clear, however, that under the rules of the existing honours system Mr Jesus Christ could have won at least ten 'Thank You' award trophies – if not more, including the coveted Gold Trophy – but the reality is, he was nominated for an award by only one of the ten lepers.
"We must always remember, it's the sole moral responsibility of the beneficiary of any kindness or courtesy, big or small, to thank the benefactor and of no one else," he said.
Today, Jesus, whose popularity and philosophical uptake is rapidly gaining momentum, was distributing clothing and food to the homeless, poor and needy people in outer villages. He was not available for comment. (FP)
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